Saturday, August 21, 2010

Living in an international commune - Part ! (not a typo, it is an exclamation mark)

Inbetween languages there is again language itself. As if it refers to itself and by doing so making itself understandable. Very simplistic way of understanding this would be repetition which is different in every movement of repeating. Experiencing this fact knowing what it is, is just wonderful.

On the other hand, sharing things, in other words living in a commune is tricky. I can say that having an international quality ease things for a commune a little bit. Everybody is curious about the other so they let each other be in order to observe the other and having a sense of the other's ways of doing things. That's why this could be called a "community of individuals" if we are willing to let go the strict sense of being an individual. Because here there is a very vague shape of being individual. It is the culture you represent, the place where you came from what counts as the reason of curiosity in the first place. But I am not willing to surrender the beauty of being let free just because the reason of it affirms representation.

And it is not always the case either. I'd rather think that personal differences are recognized in a very short while. You can always see two Italians who don't like each other and rather hanging out with other nationalities. It would be logically correct to say that they are giving each other space to be free by being away of each other. But they still say hi when they see each other also. This wouldn't be happening in Italy, because they would not be obligated to live in the same environment. International student complex in which they will be living at least 5 months forces them to live in peace recognizing their differences.

Nevertheless it is a community which forces itself on individuals with its architecture. But this architecture is one of proliferation. It enables recognizing differences. Curiosity of the other becomes an expression of the architecture, through the architecture. Curiosity expresses itself much more easily.

Or all of this may be too much loaded with optimisim...

(I think it is not over yet)

Living in an international commune - Part 1

I have been doing this for a while. 8 months of living in an international student complex was the best experience for me while my life is breaking apart in every way. To come here, I had to let go all that I call myself. I had to break up with my 13 year boyfriend whom I lived with almost all my life. I ended up without a roof over my head, without a job, without any financial security. In short now I was a student without the security of a family too.

When you don't have a fixed identity -this is the definition of student, being in a constant flux, processing, being the process itself- it is very easy to make friends. Like children almost. If you have an attractive toy (a possibility of having fun, a promise), somebody definetely would come to you and say "do you wanna be my friend?" That's it! Now you have a friend with whom you can play with. Now I have 5-6 people I live with and share almost everything. But what is amazing about it, is that each of them comes from a different part of the world. They bring with them their language, in other words the atmosphere of their country. Very distinct qualities, sensations, feelings, colors... and while everybody is trying to understand each other, it is not the information about the country's ways of doings given verbally that enables feeling each other. What enables making sense of each other is the inbetween misunderstandings and jokes that come afterwards when the misunderstanding is cleared enough to see there is always something else to see. Another perspective. One that could not be thought while staying the same person, in the same identity. Constant shifting of the very grounds of understanding. Surfing in sensations. And in Holland, it is easier for the obvious reasons:)

(hopefully)To be continued...

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Proposition #...

Everything happens in the middle of things, not to things or even of things... The middle is between things where we see nothing but a void separating things.

So to be able to grasp reality at its most, there should be no focus in the traditional sense of the word. The right attitude begins with a rather blurry vision.

Just like the crazy man in the movie Patch Adams - running around showing his four fingers, asking how many fingers are there and getting angry when he gets the same and sane answer which is four - we have to insist on a blurry vision in order to see the complexity of happening. At the end Patch comes up with the right answer: there are eight fingers when one is not focused on them but tries to capture the whole experience including the seeing eyes. This attitude may not be appropriate for all kinds of experience but it surely applies to some better than a focused attitude. Actually the insistence should be on seeing the complexity of happening. Blurry vision is just a consequence of it. It can be clarified. Slowly. Like a digestive process.